The Text Game

On the subject of texting..

It is very likely you have all participated in the text game, even if you dont know you have.  I for one have on many an occasion, I am ashamed to say. 

The text game is simple.  Someone you are seeing texts you and you respond.  You text back and forth until the conversation has run its course and then the next day you say to your mate ‘Why hasn’t she text me, I text her last.'  Your mate will chorus back with ‘but she text you first yesterday.’  And so you fall into the eternal dilemma, do you text her or wait for her to text you?  It starts as a sexy game between you but ends up being a internal battle, seeing how long you can hold on without texting back.

Myself and my illustrious ex used to play this game until, the second time we dated we came to the conclusion that it would be better to be predictable then annoying.  We would text each other every hour.  That way we were in constant contact, but never felt claustrophobic.  Now, this may seem bizarre to you (it felt it to me at the time) but it was also nice.  Waiting for a text that you knew was going to arrive, knowing someone was always thinking of you is something I enjoyed.

This got me thinking about the dilemmas of texting.  I will tell you of one which is faced on a regular basis by one of my best gays.  She loves texting when drunk or hungover.  This leads her to send mammoth rambling incoherent texts, to which the recipient never replies.  I have gone so far to take her phone off her and delete the number all together.  But alas, in a drunken blur she heads to good old Facebook, retrieves the number and ploughs forth with her ramblings.  Dating nightmare?   Yes indeed.

There are so many pitfalls to texting, a veritable minefield of embarassment. I have created a good few text boo boo's myself.  Not of the long rambling variety I may add, I like to keep it short and sweet.  My text nightmares are caused by none other then predictive text.


Some of my nightmares are as follows:


Join me for a meal tonight? > Join me for a neck tonight?


Im guna kick your ass! > Im guna lick your ass! (just before a second date none the less)


Next time your in Brighton gime a call and we'll hook up > Next time your in Brighton gime anal and we'll hook up


Im going for a walk with Sarah and will head over after> Im going for a wank with Sarah and will head over after


I feel ill, im getting sick> I feel ill, im getting dick


And what have I learn from this? Absolutely nothing. These texts are among the best I've ever sent :-)